Wednesday Randoms

• The Christmas tree is up, the branches have settled, and I'm happy to see my ornaments again. Such a shame they spend 11months hidden away in a dark closet. Then again, they wouldn't be special if they were on display all year.
• Alec Baldwin gets kicked off a flight after refusing to stop playing Words With Friends before takeoff. Hmmm... Can't say I blame him. He could've have a TL/TW combo on deck ready to drop hard on someone. He's too much of a wild card. For the comedic talent he possesses, he should really amp up the common sense at his age. He's genius on 30 Rock, but the next time he pulls something, he'll be first on my SYAD list!
• Capitalized on an early morning wake up by hitting the dreadtreadmill. It's not often I naturally wake up at 4:45am, full of energy.
• Am I the only one wary of leaving the house with the dishwasher running, for fear of coming home to a flooded, gigantic mountain of bubbles? I hear things like this happen.
• Less than a month until 2012. I've never really had a list of 'resolutions'. I prefer to set and achieve my goals year round, instead of waiting for a big glass ball in NYC to drop and tell me it's okay to start. In my mind, when I think ahead 1, 3, or 6 months, it's like this big circular track graphic, divided into 12 pieces, pops into my head. Every time. This might sound nuts, so I'm going to include a drawing so the random readers of the world can see just what I mean. (This post isn't called Wednesday Randoms for nothing folks)

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That's about it for the randomness. Today has a much bigger meaning, something fairly personal, and although I'm reluctant to get personal on my... um... personal blog... I'm going to.

16 years ago today, my best friend Amy was tragically killed in a car crash on the way to school. She was less than 1/4mi from our high school on a narrow back road, and I was about 2min behind her. For whatever reason, I didn't get out and see what was holding up the backed up line of cars down the hill at 7:30am that day like I usually would. I can only imagine I'd be horrifed at what I saw . Instead, I turned around, took a side road, and as I walked into school I watched under an overcast, gray, cold December sky as 5 ambulances raced past us towards that back road.

"Must have been a bad accident" I thought to myself.

It was. She was driving and they hit a tree at 50mph. Her boyfriend walked away with scratches. She didn't make it.

I was fortunate during my early years of life to have never looked real devastation in the face. I have a small family, and no one was ever sick, nothing tragic occurred, and those who died were in their 90s, and I barely ever knew them. I never dreamed the shocking and painful first experience with a sudden death (and a funeral) would be that of my best friend at 16yrs old. I saw her the day before... and then she was gone. Forever.

Personally, I didn't know how to process grief at that age. I never remember feeling completely numb like that in my entire life, and I haven't felt that since that very day 16yrs ago. Her family was obviously devastated, and I'll never forget that feeling of walking up to her house and her brother opening the door, and me just standing there, frozen, and not being able to find any words. It still saddens me to think she never had the chance to graduate, or go to college, or travel, or skydive, or buy her own house; all the things I've done in the past 16yrs. Knowing her enriched my life for sure, and I've yet to meet anyone else like her.

Here's a pic of us from the first day of school in 10th grade, taken outside my house. Her brother drove us to school in the convertible, and my dad insisted on taking a picture despite my begging him not to, that we were "too old for that". Amy, of course, made some funny remark which had me laughing and looking at her when the (non-digital) pic was taken. She would give me props right now for posting a terrible old pic of myself online... and then rip me like crazy for all this blogging :)